Wednesday, February 11, 2009

please explain this to me

I went to the gym in our apartment complex last night to run on the treadmill. The gym has old school treadmills and a few newer treadmills that at least look like they were manufactured in this century. Anyway, only one of the newer treadmills was available so I walked over to it. As I made my approach, I noticed a green sign on one of the arms of the treadmill. The sign read something like this:

"Please do not pounce or slam down on this treadmill. Doing so will cause the treadmill to make a loud noise and disturb others who are working out. A nice, smooth pace will work best."

So, as I begin my run, I'm trying to imagine what in the hell one does in order to pounce or slam down on a treadmill? And as I'm running, I'm also now super self conscious about my stride. Am I pouncing? Am I slamming down? What happens if the treadmill starts making a God-awful noise and disturbs others? Should I just jump off the treadmill and leave? Well, apparently, I kept a nice, smooth pace and had nothing to worry about.

But seriously, I'm totally picturing someone like 5 feet from the treadmill, getting a running start, and jumping or "slamming down" on the treadmill. And what kind of noise does a treadmill make that may disturb others?

1 comment:

Frank said...

I will explain this to you. For someone of your size and stature, this "disturbing noise" will never be a problem. For me, however, being a manly man weighing in at a brawny 185 pounds, when I have the pleasure of yogging on a man-made torture device it makes a pounding noise every time one of my clodhoppers hits the treads. Attention everyone, I jog like a flat-footed retard.